What keeps running along my head? It’s about my life and how it affects others.
I feel so dizzy.
I feel so tired.
I feel so restless.
I feel insecure.
I feel left alone.
I feel my knees, they hurt so much.
I feel my nape, they make me fall asleep.
I want to stop teaching my previous students.
I actually want to end everything.
Why do I hold on?
What should keep me alive?
If I were to cause distress, pain, and disappointment for loving someone…
Why can’t I just die and disappear in this world?
What should make me value each day that passes by?
What should keep me hoping?
Do you still love me after what I did..?
Would I be lost forever?
Would you stop holding my hand?
Would I end up grasping no hands..?
Tons of similar questions of uncertainty…
Thousands of repetitive, destructive thoughts over-rule my mind.
Rest.
Stillness.
Silence within.
I badly needed.
