Insomniac Attack

Here I am, still awake. Here you are,reading. What will I share today? That’s something I doubt if you’re interested in. Well, if you insist…

Last Sunday, I was supposed to meet up with this guy, but my sister was suddenly taken to the hospital. She had an ectopic pregnancy, plus tumor in the ovary. What a pain.

I’m not saying this because I missed the date. Duh. How could I think of enjoying when my sister just suffered. I tried to suppress my selfishness. Humans have to know how to sympathize. We should try to put ourselves in other people’s situation.

There. I sounded too preachy. It’s not a lecture if that’s what you’ve been thinking.

God.. have I ventured too far from your will that I seem to be lost? Did I turn away from your ways? What do I really want to do with my life? Where I am really heading? My eyes are seriously darkening due to late bedtime. I couldn’t help it. I starved for almost 12 hours. That was a cruel fast but I had no choice. I got no cash.

Now, this is called whining. I’d just share something cute. Hehe.. Don’t contend! This is my blog, anyway.

Smile

Moved On

I knew I got to admit that my feelings for him has changed since I read his reply to my letter. What? Just that? I can’t believe how pathetic I have been for believing there’s some special thread connecting us. There isn’t.

Most truthful things are bitter. We’ve just got to take hold of them no matter how cold they seem to be.  Hard facts from his very own mouth. Ouch. I knew from that day on that I had to move on. He doesn’t seem to think the way I do. It’s as simple as that.

Now.. was I thinking of shifting my attention to someone or something else to compensate for the hurts I’ve acquired out of my imaginative mind? Using people to mend? Absolutely not. My relationship with that other friend isn’t something that should be used as a replacement or mender.

I just don’t ever want to keep grasping something that has always been too far to reach. It’s not giving up. Just moving on to something else worth my time and effort. It’s making me old to think of reaching the unreachable. Perhaps it’s time to loosen up and keep my expectations low.

Adios.